Never say never
by dorina16able
Summary: Jean has feelings for Sasha. That much is clear. What is not clear is why Marco, Connie and Eren constantly tell him to do something about it…why on earth should he ever confess his probably unrequited feelings anyway? Modern High School AU


**A/N: So, the Jeansasha shippers are here (welcome to the ship, guys, I'm so glad I'm not the only one), the sap in me can't leave me alone as it seems, which means...the pair of adorable dorks strikes again ;) I tried to experiment with some High School AU this time, 1) because I thought it'd be fun to write, 2) because I can TOTALLY imagine Jean being a modern adorable teenager who doesn't know what to do about his year-long crush for a certain Sasha, hehe and 3) because I NEEDED to write a fiction where poor adorable Marco is alive!**

 **So, bear with me, guys, and brace yourselves for a major bomb of sappiness :P**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own the Attack on Titan characters in any way.**

"You have to do something about it!"

"Yeah, you're right, Marco, I have to throw these two goofballs," Jean points towards Eren and Connie, who look at him with an innocent What-did-we-do expression, "out of my house and actually focus on that damn French essay, otherwise Professor Levi will behead me."

"Well, yeah, I know Levi can be pretty scary, but it's not what I'm talking about here, Jean." Marco smiles goodheartedly at his childhood friend, who sighs loudly because he has an idea about what his freckled buddy actually wants to say.

"Then what _are_ you talking about?" he feigns ignorance nonetheless because there's no way he's starting the usual conversation and especially with the aforementioned goofballs present.

"About the weather! What do you think he's talking about, smartie?" Connie ignores the warning signals that shout I-don't-wanna-talk-about-this-specific-subject and stares as Jean as if he seriously doubts his intelligence. "Marco here wants to say that you have to finally grow up and talk to Sasha—"

"Connie, don't continue!"

"—about how much you've been pining after her; and, yeah, it _does_ sound weird coming from me," Connie concludes and frowns and no one can blame him; after all, Connie and Sasha have known each other since elementary school.

"Well, if it sounds weird, then _don't_ talk about it, it's not rocket science, Springer!" Jean exclaims and hides his head on his French book, wondering for the millionth time how on earth he ended up with this group of crazies and why on earth he can't stop thinking about a certain Potato Girl.

And the only reason he's blushing right now is because the weather today is really hot and _not_ because he's thinking about Potato Girl's smiles and her jokes and the pranks she plays on everyone with Connie and that warmth and light she seems to bring wherever she goes. Nope. Definitely not.

 _Ugh, god dammit!_

He's already sunken way too deep, hasn't he?

And his infatuation isn't enough, no, he has to listen to Connie and Eren's (and Marco's, but he's his best friend and so he doesn't count) rambling about how he should stop being a coward and do something and confess what he feels and 'be all lovey-dovey with the girl instead of brooding 24/7'—Eren's words, not Jean's.

"And, anyway, I still don't get why you're acting as if it's a bad thing. Sasha's a great girl and I honestly believe that you two will be good together," Marco comments now and pats Jean's back, making him raise his head and look at him with a half-depressed and half-pitiful gaze.

"Is the fact that the feeling's not mutual a good enough explanation for you or do you need another reason?" he groans in the end and ignores the sting of pain due to the rejection he'll surely receive if he makes a move. "She hasn't shown anything, she can be in love with freaking Connie for all I know!"

"Ew, no, man! She's my best friend and all but I love her as a sister, that's all!"

"Yes, the terrible twins." Eren laughs before his eyes travel to Jean again. "And anyway, why are you so sure that she doesn't feel anything, eh? That's why the _confessing_ part actually exists!"

"So I make a damn fool of myself?"

"So you clear the situation, you idiot!"

"And risk our friendship?"

Because Jean has to admit to himself that _this_ is the main reason why he hasn't let Sasha know about his persistent feelings, preferring to be next to her as nothing more than a very good friend. He fears that Sasha will feel awkward around him and stop talking to him altogether…and this is way worse for Jean than suppressing everything he feels.

Oh who is he kidding, both cases suck and drive him mad anyway!

"In any case, I think you should take the risk anyway." Marco speaks, surprising all of them, because Marco is known for going with careful planning and not so rush solutions; and if the look Jean shoots him could kill, Marco would be a pile of ash right now. "Think about it, Jean, we're in our last year anyway, don't you think that you should take a chance before we graduate? You know what they say about final year, it's supposed to be a year of rethinking and of closing unfinished business…"

"Hallelujah!" Connie throws his hands in the air and high-fives Marco. "See, everyone says it, it's starting to become annoying, the way you look at her, it's just like—"

"—like the way Mikasa constantly looks at Eren over here?" Jean helps him and, despite the stupid teenage drama he's facing, a devious smirk appears on his face when Eren _finally_ stops his remarks on Jean's non-existing love life and takes a terrified expression.

"Wait, what?! What are you talking about? Stop smirking like that!" he snaps at them because now both Jean and Connie are grinning and even Marco is trying very hard not to chuckle. "Anyway, I'm not the case here, _you_ are."

"Ugh, I hate it when you guys are so persistent! And why on earth should I tell her how I feel again?" he asks the difficult question again and this time the other three boys seriously look as if they want to smack him and drag him to Sasha.

"Oh, I don't know, Jean, maybe because you've been head over heels in love with her for two years now? Just saying!" Eren exclaims as if he's dealing with a little kid. "And Marco's right, it's our final year, about time to clear this before we all leave for college!"

"And I don't think that Sasha will be awkward around you…if she doesn't feel the same she'll be kind to you and that's all," Marco comforts him and Jean sighs, thinking that his friend doesn't know Sasha; should the feelings not be mutual—which they're _not_ , he bets on that—awkwardness will be the prevailing emotion.

But the only thing his friends see is that he has to _talk_ ; of course they're simplifying things way too much, ever since that totally embarrassing moment two years ago when they had a house party at Jean's, with Marco, Connie and Eren staying over to help him afterwards because he had gotten stupidly drunk…so stupidly drunk actually that he had become a mess of emotions and had blabbed out how hopelessly in love he was with the Potato Girl.

And since then he can't find peace from the wanna-be matchmakers.

"Don't be so sure that she'll say 'no', though. Risk it. Talk to her. From the moment you admitted it to yourself, admitting it to _her_ is a piece of cake so stop being so melodramatic, Jean-boy!"

"Stop calling me that!"

"Whatever, Horseface!"

"You're ridiculous!"

* * *

'Take the chance and talk to her', easy for them to say, they're not going through his drama and they speak from a more composed perspective. But how on earth can Jean find the courage to do as they advise him when Sasha's occupying his mind even when she's not present?

Break is welcome by all the students of Trost High School and Jean enjoys the lively atmosphere of the building's cafeteria, where he and his friends sit at a large table and talk all together at the same time and tease each other. Or, well, he enjoys it when he can focus on _them_ , but that's a whole other story.

That day, though, he notices that Sasha isn't with them and he worries that something's wrong with her. His classmates smirk when he asks them about it as he tries to give a casual tone in his voice, but, in the end, it's Armin who answers. "Oh, she's outside, says she wants to enjoy the sun in the courtyard before having to endure Shadis's PE class."

"She okay?"

"She's great." Armin assures him with a smile and Jean can't know whether to interpret it as a Don't-worry-about-your-friend-everything's-okay smile or as a It's-too-obvious-so-now-is-your-chance-to-talk-to-her-alone smile. "You can check it yourself if you don't believe me, though, I know you guys have been pretty close friends for a couple of years now."

"Oh, you have no idea." Eren laughs, evoking the usual wolf-whistles and oooh's and aaaah's from the rest of the group.

"Guys!" Marco and Armin exclaim simultaneously and stare at Jean, who has a Someone-kill-me-now-please expression, despite his hard and futile attempts to appear as cool in front of the others.

"Leave it, guys; I've told everyone here a thousand times that it's more possible for Reiner to ask Krista out than for Sasha to date me, so drop it already!"

"Hey, try asking Krista out when Ymir is next to her, which is always!" said blond defends himself and crosses his arms in front of his chest. "I don't wanna die slowly and painfully, thank you very much!"

"See, Jean? At least you don't have that danger from Sasha's best friend," Connie, who obviously hasn't grasped the meaning of the phrase 'drop it', points at himself and continues making Jean beg the ground to swallow him entirely. "Besides, I'll owe you a favor, Eren will owe me ten bucks if you guys get together within the week!"

"Oh, what a marvelous love confession that will be!" Jean scoffs and punches Connie's arm. "'Hey, Sasha, what's up, I wanna tell you I'm desperately in love with you and I wanna kiss you endlessly and do all that warm and fuzzy stuff I normally hate with you because your dumb best friend will win ten bucks from Jaeger!'"

"Well…if you skip that last part and work a bit on your words it sounds like a pretty decent love confession if you ask me." Marco comments smiling and now Jean groans; it really hurts when even your best friend sides with the others.

"Seriously, though, what _do_ you have to lose?" Bertholdt speaks for the first time and, since he asked to speak seriously, Jean doesn't answer at once.

He wants to tell them the usual argument about how he doesn't want to risk the friendship he's built with Sasha over the years; he has come a long way from considering her annoying and making fun of her and he won't risk that again. But he has the impression that the others won't accept this answer; the way they all look at him, even Reiner and Bertholdt who know only the general story, tells him that they will actually consider strangling him if he mentions that…just like they will strangle him if he mentions his fear of rejection—which is totally stupid and Jean himself knows that.

Which leaves him at a dead end because he only has these two reasons to defend his decision to stay silent and not do anything. Meaning that there is only one alternative and that is what all the others have been telling him: to finally speak.

 _Wait, what?!_ he thinks and almost gasps at the sudden realization. _Since when do you think about telling her, Kirstein, after all this struggle you've been through to hide everything?_

"Nothing to say, eh? See, you know we're right and if you weren't such a scared idiot—"

"Oh let him think in peace for a minute!" Marco scolds Connie and glares at Eren and Reiner, who seem ready to speak too. "It's his decision to make in the end!"

"Exactly! And since you seem to have the goddamn foresight and are so sure that everything will be fine, I'll do you the favor to talk to her before you guys drive me mad!" Jean slams his hands on the table as he stands up, not even knowing where this new-found determination is coming from. "And when you see that I was right and that everything will go down, it'll be _your_ responsibility."

"Prepare those ten bucks, Eren. Someone's woken up." Connie whispers and the amusement is clear in his voice. "Never say never, Jean, you never know when pleasant surprises wait for you."

* * *

Jean spots Sasha almost immediately when he exits the school building and takes a look around at the sunny yard. She's sitting with her back against a tree and with her tray of food beside her, one hand holding an apple and the other her Science book—how she manages to eat and study at the same time is beyond Jean's knowledge. He leans against a column and watches her for a couple of seconds with a tender smile he never shows to anyone else, observing her concentrated expression and the way the sun creates patterns on her hair…cursing her for turning him into such a sap because he's Jean Kirstein and Jean Kirstein _doesn't_ do sap.

Realizing that he's been staring too long and he's almost appearing as some creeper, he approaches her and Sasha looks up from her book at the sound of the steps, smiling brightly at him and making him smile back automatically as he tosses her the apple he took from the cafeteria before coming to find her.

"I thought you'd need a little extra to help you with PE," he chuckles and winks at her, the chuckle turning into a fit of laughter as Sasha places her book next to her and runs into his arms, lifting her feet in the air due to the force of her embrace.

"Oh my God, Jean, you're the absolute _best_!" she squeaks while wrapping her arms around his neck, Jean holding her tightly to stop her from throwing both of them down because so much proximity is too much for him and his already-too-sappy emotions. "What would I ever do without you?"

"Ah, don't worry, thank God you won't have to find out, no fear of losing me here!"

Sasha pulls away from his hug at the sound of these words and Jean slaps himself mentally; God, he always had an issue with words but why has his brain-to-mouth filter failed him just now?! He just had to go and mess everything up, right? He feels the first strings of panic, which increase when he sees Sasha's shining hazel eyes filled with tears and her face having a painful expression. A sudden urge to console her overwhelms him and he spontaneously leans towards her, wanting to peck her comfortingly, consequences be damned, but she moves away from him, a sob escapes her lips and Jean feels his heart actually sinking.

 _So everything would go well, huh, guys?_

"Damn it, I-I'm sorry, Sasha, I-I don't know why I…it just came out—"

"Who?"

"What do you mean?"

"Who told you, Jean?" Sasha elaborates and now a few tears make their way down her cheeks. Jean stretches his arms, wanting to hug her, to apologize, but he winces when she pushes him away roughly; she has never done that before, it's the first time he sees her losing her composure like that.

"Who told me what, Sasha?" he keeps a gentle tone nonetheless, wanting to approach the subject carefully, since he doesn't know what she's talking about…a part of him wants to run away and fetch Connie, he'll know how to calm her down, but if he runs now everything will be over before he even knows it.

"Stop it! Just stop…I-I know it's ridiculous and I knew you'd act like that, I deserve that, of course you'd make fun of me about that, but don't pretend to be so ignorant, I can't handle that!"

"Hey, hey, hey," now Jean gently grabs both of her arms, ignoring her attempts to push him away again and to avoid his worried glance as the pieces of the puzzle start falling into place…does she seriously think that he's _pranking_ her, that he's said that because he wants to make fun of her afterwards? "Sasha, Sasha, I'm _not_ acting, I swear, I'm not that much of a jerk…please, calm down, talk to me, help me understand what you mean."

"What I mean?!" Sasha almost stutters because of the sobs that wreck her and Jean leaves another hurt wince seeing her like that…he almost regrets ever deciding to open up to her, but now it's too late and she deserves a clear picture, especially from the moment she thinks he doesn't mean anything. "Honestly, Jean, what I mean? You wanna say that no one told you and that you simply said this thing and tried to kiss me out of the blue because you felt like it?"

"Told me what, for God's sake?"

"Oh, maybe how much in love I am with you?" she shouts, causing a few curious glares from passing students, who quickly averted their eyes and focused on their own matters. "Isn't that why you approached me all of a sudden, to pretend to like me back and then laugh at me? Seriously, Jean, no need to pretend anymore, it's what I was expecting anyway—"

But the end of the sentence is interrupted by Jean pecking her like he wanted to: light and quick pecks that want to assure her that this is not some kind of act and calm her down. He can feel her tears, which are still running, but right now it's the least he cares about, he simply cradles her face and lovingly wipes them away. Sasha doesn't respond at first, a part of her still afraid that he's not honest, but in the end she gives in and kisses him back, reluctantly, as if unable to believe that this is actually happening.

"I-I had no idea, Sasha, I came to tell you that _I've_ been totally in love with you for two years, I had no idea you felt the same, I feared I'd bring you in a difficult position, I'd never expect you to like me back…I promise, this is not an act!" he rambles when they pull away, still remaining close to her and stroking her cheek, and Sasha smiles widely at him, tears still running down her face, and she hugs him tightly.

"You're honest…Oh my God, you're honest, you're not making fun of me?"

"Of course not, Sasha, ever since you came at my place for Hanji's project two years ago and you slept over…you were so peaceful, as if it was something totally normal for you to stay at my house."

"Well, I beat you, I've had feelings for you ever since you challenged me to that cooking contest we had at school and I was so embarrassed afterwards and you took my hand and told me I had no reason to be ashamed."

"But that makes it three years!"

"Yep."

Jean sighs and hugs her even tighter, planting a kiss on her temple as an apology… _three_ _years_? He sighs, wondering if Sasha has been through the same restlessness as he has, nights when she couldn't sleep, troubled thoughts, dilemmas about what she should do, combined with the fear that he would make fun of her…as if he'd make fun of something like that. But it has no sense to think about it anymore and a smile appears on his face as he leans against the tree and Sasha snuggles in his hug, enjoying the few minutes they have before the bell rings and impatient for school to end so they can go somewhere quiet to talk about everything.

"Jean?"

"Hm?"

"Does that mean that now you'll buy me French fries whenever I ask you to?"

"Oh, shut up, you crazy Potato Girl!"

* * *

 **A/N: Oh, what is this pair doing to me, I already came up with an idea for a new one-shot while writing this one :P Hope you liked it, everyone, and if you have any requests for me to write about our couple (note that I write K to T fiction) don't hesitate to tell me ;)  
**


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